Project Runway Season 9 – First Show

Herewith, my review/stream of consciousness initial impressions on the first show of season nine of the ever-lovin show we know as Project Runway that aired last Wednesday, July 27. Obsess with me …

Regarding the contestants – call me cynical (I’ve been called worse), but … OF COURSE you have to put the testicular cancer survivor on the show. OF COURSE you have to put the former Miss Universe contestant on (even though she can’t sew, more on that below). OF COURSE you have to put on the cute 57 year old man who recently lost his partner to AIDS and is beating an alcohol problem …

But the beauty of the first show is the inherent promise that all the candidates possess. They’re all brand-spanking shiny and new, freshly scrubbed and eyes twinkling. It’s anyone’s game at the beginning. Any one of them could be a star.

Regarding the true stars, Heidi Klum looks fan-freakin-tastic. But I have a complaint: they didn’t show her legs at all in this episode. There should be something in her contract about always showing leg, although I believe she’s an executive producer so that may be moot.

Michael Kors looks slightly less…orange?

Nina Garcia is consistently stylish – props to my Colombiana compatriot.

Guest judge Christina Ricci had some relevant comments but looked a bit too thin for my tastes, in that bobblehead kind of way.

Regarding the first challenge – the 16 contestants are ripped from sleep in their trendy communal lofts at 5 am and ordered to march as is (no showering, not even allowed to put on a bra) through the streets of Manhattan with only a bedsheet to cover themselves. HORROR. That is one of my nightmares that people will see what I look like when I first wake up. Aside from the horror of being awoken at 5 am, which is the middle of the night. After this experience, I would henceforth sleep fully dressed and in full make-up. I may just start doing that in my life anyway just in case.

One of my two favorite quotes from this episode:

“It didn’t really occur to me that I would be that far behind, until I was that far behind.” – uttered by the former Miss Universo contestant from Trinidad. She is lovely and stylish.

On the surface, she’s got that going for her. She’s gorgeous and she was a Miss Universe contestant. Hampering her, however, is her admission that she can’t sew – she only started learning sewing skills four months before the show. Haven’t the producers learned their lesson yet in putting people on the show who can’t sew? I reject that choice. Although lo and behold this contestant did surprisingly well in the first challenge – could it be that the judges know better than I do? Hmmm.

Prior to airing the first show of the new season, Bravo aired a special pre-show to chronicle the audition and casting process, which was interesting. I applaud this addition to the line-up. Of course I only caught the last 15 minutes or so of that show, but I’ll catch up on that when Bravo replays it about 57,000 times.

Other new thing this season, during the first show, they invited 20 contestants to NYC and had them all show their wares on racks like during the casting process, and eliminated 4 of them right off the bat. So 4 of them had to go home before the show even started. Kind of a bummer.

Early on, the runway shows seem so long since there are so many contestants. Then as the season progresses, and there are fewer contestants, you find yourself wishing for more outfits on the catwalk. Early on, I don’t learn names. Early on, I don’t get attached too soon. You never know who is going to be eliminated from the competition and break your heart.

Second favorite quote of the night, from Michael Kors commenting on one of the ensembles, that was, in his estimation, “… instead of being fashion forward, it’s fashion backward.”

Tune in this Wednesday for installment two of this season, and we'll discuss. No?

Bravo, how I’ve missed you

Used to be, the Bravo channel would put something on the air, and I’d watch it. They could film someone in Manhattan (surely someone svelte and well-styled) rearranging his or her linen closet and I’d tune in religiously. Of course it wouldn’t hurt that the linen closet was probably stocked with Frette and Pratesi worth more than my car and that the person was fabulous.

Bravo has a rhythym and a style and it works. From the Fab Five to Top Design to Real Housewives of Atlanta – I was in.

But after Project Runway moved to Lifetime (a move I still don’t entirely approve of), the Bravo channel and I had a cooling off period. Plus, Top Chef has been hiatus seemingly forever and My Life on the D List was sadly cancelled.

But at least they are still showing Kathy Griffin’s stand-up specials, and last night I caught “50 and Not Pregnant,” She looks fabulous, especially for a 50-year old. I know cosmetic surgery is involved, I know, but still. She is owning it and she is rockin’ it.

After the Griffin special, I got sucked into chef Rocco DiSpirito’s latest endeavor, the reality show “Rocco’s Dinner Party.” In the show, Rocco invites a mélange of b-list actors, chefs, business people, food writers, etc. to an awkward dinner party catered by two competing chefs. For example, this week’s guests included Raven Symone and the guy that stands out in my mind for playing the jerk Shooter McGavin in Happy Gilmore.

Aside from the laziness factor of not changing the channel, there were two reasons I stayed tuned for part of the Rocco show:

1. I’m trying to figure out what the deal is with Rocco DiSpirito. He seems to have bounced around from reality show, to restaurant, to web series (is that the Siberia of Hollywood or totally legit nowadays?) and of course multiple cookbooks – but yet it feels like he has never quite broken through to the big time. Is he not living up to his potential or is he just overrated?

Did we all get together as a society and decide that we’re willing to keep giving Rocco vehicles because he’s tall and good-looking and has some cooking talent? I’m ok with that, I just want to know if that’s what was agreed to.

2. Second reason for watching, in the promo clips and the show bumps, it looked like one of Rocco’s guests was a Liza Minelli impersonator. 45 goram minutes into the episode, and no Liza. Disappointing.

I will say a highlight of the show was the décor and the design of the dining rooms. Is Rocco like a nice-looking piece of furniture? He’s handsome, but I don’t know if he’s got the personality to carry this. Maybe throw Padma in there to liven things up.

But Bravo, I’m glad we kissed and made up. Smooch smooch.

P.S. the new season of Project Runway debuted tonight on Lifetime. Since I think Bravo and Lifetime are owned by the same parent company, I don’t feel like it’s really cheating for me to watch. I wanted to let the new season wash over me and enjoy the experience, and in a few days I’ll be ready to talk about it – possibly in an obsessive manner.