Thursday, February 10, 2011

VD Gifts Explored Volume 2

Follow up to my controversial Valentine’s Day post, on gifts you really shouldn’t buy – hint - it's not cockroaches.

This info is from a website that is geared toward women who are newly married/shacking up, it’s their recommended list of what purport to be “non cheesy” Valentine’s gifts that ‘your man will really like.’

We’ll be the judge of that.
  • A pillow that says “STUD” for his man cave. Er, no.
  • Gourmet cookies that spell out X’s and O’s. Ehhhh … .borderline. do you really need to spend beau coup bucks on gourmet treats that are shipped in from San Francisco? Probably not. And I love San Francisco. But in general I guess sugar snackies are ok.
  • Monogrammed leather cover for his iPad. YES. Finally a good one. Or, how about a leather cover with a new iPad inside. Ditto for iPhones. Or i-anything.
  • Mug with kissy lips all over it. NO people. No.
  • Another throw pillow that says “I love u a lot” or something to that effect. Maybe I’m just anti-throw pillows in general. Don’t get the appeal. Have multiples of them around my house, and they seem to always be in my way.
  • Bi-lingual conversation hearts. Points for effort, but still no.
  • Matching mittens (twittens). I’m going to have to go with – no.
  • Ok, yet another throw pillow, this one with your silhouettes on it. Newp.
  • Book with ideas on small places in which to have sex, e.g. theater balcony, elevator, ski lift. I don’t know if men actually need a book to give them these ideas. And no mention of the back of a Volkswagen!
  • Ray Ban sunglasses. Don’t know what these have to do with Valentine’s Day, but yes, these are good. I will accept these.
  • Lastly, chocolate flavored vodka. I hate to be grumpy here, because I love vodka, and I love chocolate. But I have never been inspired to combine the two.

Honorable mention for those of you who are truly desperate: the Bronx Zoo is offering a unique and romantic gift idea for that special someone in your life: name a Madagascar hissing cockroach in their honor. Only $10!

Ok so now that the countdown is on and it’s only a few days before VD strikes, have you taken care of your gift-buying responsibilities? My significant other got excited when he read my last post saying how a flat-screen TV makes a good gift …. Whoops. Guess I walked into that one.
(that’s what she said)


  1. Ugh. Must be a website "for women, by women." You gotta stick with the basics: booze, sex, steak, tech gadgets, power tools. Haven't done my shopping yet but, like most men, will take full advantage of the weekend (i.e., scramble to find something left over at Walgreens at 9 pm Sunday night). SO jealous that yours is getting a flat screen!

  2. That is a good list, Will. I don't think you can go wrong with booze, sex, steak, gadgets and power tools, for any occasion. but what would we do without Walgreen's? unfortunately, where I live you can't buy booze at Walgreens.