Join me in embracing a microwave-free lifestyle

A few years ago my husband and I moved from Arizona to the east coast. As part of the big move we evaluated our belongings to decide what to bring, what to toss, what to donate. You really don’t know how much stuff you have until you have to schlep it cross country. I have found that you make tougher decisions based on whether you’re having professionals pack and ship your stuff versus doing it yourself.

Anyway, tens of trips to the Goodwill later, one item still remained unresolved – the microwave. I made the executive decision to leave our microwave behind since it was getting on in years, and I figured we’d get a new one for the new place.

Fast forward to a teensy tiny outdated kitchen in our new suburban pied-a-terre, and the microwave dilemma. Until we get around to remodeling the kitchen, the best option is a countertop model. However, it would appear that kitchens built in the early 1950s didn’t take microwave counter space, or any counter space at all really, into consideration. I looked around and couldn’t find a decent, small, reasonably priced microwave that I liked. I didn’t want to pay too much for a microwave, knowing that at some point in the not too distant future, we’d be swapping it out with an under-counter/above stove model. You can see my dilemma. Oh, the challenges of the modern world. In the meantime, some months passed.

And during that time, I had an epiphany. We didn’t need a microwave!

Eureka. We could live a new and exciting, microwave-free life. No more snacking on processed foods because they were easy to nuke. Less of a reliance on frozen stuff. More of an incentive to eat fresh foods. Healthier, I told myself.

Now I find myself in year two of the great microwave free experiment. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not totally against microwaves. I’m not like a vegetarian for whom meat-eating is not situational. I take full advantage of the microwave at the office. Does that make me a hypocrite? I don’t know. I just know this is about as close to roughing it as I get.

I was happy to see in my pre-snowstorm raid of the grocery store yesterday, that they still make Jiffy Pop, that popcorn you can make on the stovetop that blows up to a lovely aluminum zeppelin. Is that a regional thing? I’ll try making it and let you know if it’s as fun to make as it was when I was 8 years old.

I do know there are definitely some downsides to not having a microwave, namely:
• No microwave popcorn
• No instant way to reheat leftovers
• No fast way to make baked potatoes
• I guess my gas bill might be higher since I use the stove more?
• People think you’re strange when you tell them you have no microwave

I wonder if there is paperwork involved to start a cult. In the meantime, please send a check to me for membership dues and a self-addressed-stamped envelope for an eventual newsletter.